I began listening to the Eagles in early April 2021. I didn't enjoy the band very much but if you enjoy what you know of the Eagles, you'll probably like all the albums from their debut to The Long Run.
Eagles (1972): B-
Desperado (1973): C+
On the Border (1974): B-
One of These Nights (1975): C+
Hotel California (1976): C
The Long Run (1979): B
Long Road Out of Eden (2007): C+
Eagles (1972):
Every song has strong melody and the band's playing is tight and rehearsed--Glen Frey plays many great solos and Leadon's multi-instrumental talents properly diversify the record. Their harmonies are also enjoyable with "Train Leaves Here This Morning" being the best song because of the combination of their strengths. But each of the four vocalists show little personality when they're alone at the mike and they almost entirely fail at being sentimental, which immediately discredits about a quarter of the album. Most problematic though is that everything feels too calculated--the vocals, lyrics, and production are pristine and slippery, reflecting a general vagueness that approaches arena rock in its distasteful attempts to appeal to the masses. B-
Desperado (1973):
The boys might have gotten better at songwriting and overall this might be a more complete work than their debut but I can't get around it: no one makes worse concept albums than assholes. The use of strings on rock'n'roll records only works in certain circumstances and those conditions will never be met on a country-rock album about being hard, macho men. And it doesn't matter if "it wasn’t for the money, at least it didn't start that way" was self-aware or not--the song still sucks. C+
On the Border (1974):
Surely their best record so far. The first three songs are amongst the enjoyable tracks they've recorded. I also appreciate that Bernie Leadon wrote a tribute song to country-rock legend Gram Parsons even though the corny lyrics make the song barely listenable. Besides the stupid message "he who hesitates is lunch" carved on the LP, the group is on their best boy behavior, which also makes it their least objectional album. They still aren’t convincing or interesting vocalists though. B-
One of These Nights (1975):
Many of the songs are the best rock and roll tracks the band has written and many of the songs--sometimes simultaneously--surrender to strings in hopes to sell the band's schmaltz. I get the least out of Henley as a singer, the two Leadon tracks are rubbish, Meisner’s singing is fine but not good enough, and Frey, who has somehow become the Eagle I need more out of, appears on lead vocals only twice. C+
Hotel California (1976):
The title track is one of the better songs by the group even if it is overrated. With Leadon gone, the country influence departs but the genre that these bozos play makes little difference. What does make a difference on this album is that a) more than One of These Nights, the album's subpar quality is further disparaged by sobbing strings and b) Henley, who is the only member of the band that I actively dislike (though Joe Walsh may join the club if he keeps contributing shit like "Pretty Maids in a Row"), sings five of the eight tracks. It’s never a good sign when a drummer takes over a band. C
The Long Run (1979):
The first twenty minutes makes up the best side of music the band has ever recorded. Without attempting to be sentimental or trying any slow songs, the band's greatest strengths come together while avoiding their greatest weaknesses--even Henley somehow sounds fine at the mike. New member and longtime wimp Timothy B. Schmit makes his singing debut on the second track but even that’s not enough to slow down the decency of side one. However, starting with Frey's "Heartache Tonight," side two makes up a lousy attempt at making more modern-sounding music. Luckily for them, it's just boring. Hoping not to ruin something good, I skipped reading the lyrics for this one. B
Long Road Out of Eden (2007):
This is their most offensive album in concept--that it was sold exclusively at Walmart tells you everything you need to know--but the majority of the songs to be their most agreeable. Other than Timothy Schmit, all the Eagles' vocalists don't sound terribly worse despite their old age and a lot of auto-tune. It's not terrible, especially for a 90 minute record made by aging rockers who were never exactly inventive or fun or worthy of anything more than mild praise and major mockery. Lots of decent hooks, little character, and if it were edited down to the best moments, one of their best. C+
